Monday, 31 December 2012

My Apology

He was drunken with sadness. The kind of sadness where one is forced to kneel and grasp the fine linen that graces their chest. The kind where sobs and moans over take any effort of audible sentences; deranging the opportunity for any listener within the still sky to hear his cries of embarrassment. “Guardian Angel,” he beckons, “Hear my apology!” He shifts on his knees whilst tears stream along the lines of cheek to jaw bone. Has forgotten dignity in this dark field. It is only lit by the illumination of the moon, desperation is not definitive upon such courage. He has undergone a walk through the eternal pit of damnation. Learning their secrets, their temptations and pitiful weaknesses of man. He returned from such a walk and prized himself unto the mercy of God. He began as such, beckoning to his angel. “Dear angel, hear my cry! I’m sorry for the embarrassing ways that of which I’ve led you to witness. For the mockery of God’s grace set upon my soul, my being and free will. Please hear me my angel! I’m not asking for a rescue. I’ve been there before in my weak form. A hopeless man who became self-entitled among his struggling ways. I’ve heard the evil chantings, the deceptive lies and cruel tricks that have been masterfully displayed. I’ve risen from the depths of my own tribulations. Of my own self-sinning prison. With the mercy of God, I found rescue in his Love. A love which stood over the evil mockery and taunting of my plight and had them cower in fear. No, Today on this new year I pray that my guardian, that Heaven and God can forgive me for my embarrassing ways. For the ways that I’ve made God’s laws, love and divine promises look as pitiful as I were.”
He hangs his head low as he slumps further to the ground. A clench of his jaws stills the cries that, if he were a modern man; would have succumbed to madness. His brows begin to curl into the anger that stems from his desires to serve God. An honor he only visits during his walk on earth between the engagement of the poor, needy and visiting spirits. He stands. The cool wind blowing through the grass at a timely and God given moment. He looks to the moon and nods. A quiet yet solemn promise is remembered. “I’m sorry. I’m truly sorry.” He looks down again and lets out a sigh. Dusting his knees and wiping his face.. hoping for a sign. For a symbol for anything that can be retributive to the ways of God and His choice of words. “Hey man, the heck you doin’ outside? It’s best you get in here with the rest of us and enjoy this new year party.” He turns to the individual who broke his solace. “What- what were you doing out here anyway?” the man asks while looking at him and the moon in sequence. He smiles and then chuckles. He steps forward and meets the new friend in the new years cap and graces his shoulder with his hand, “I was putting the past to rest.. my friend”, “hm.” The new friend lets out an awkward chuckle as they journey back to the party.

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