“No one likes a hero” I insisted to my wife. “Well, surely some do. The world is not only discovered but thrives upon heroic deeds daily.” I began to challenge her, “Let’s say an individual had a personal crisis and didn’t want my input”, “Why wouldn’t they want your input?”, “Because I’m not a professional”, “That seems accurate”, “But let’s say this crisis isn’t warranted on complicated medicines or diagnosis but asserting the obvious issues of their troubles that they may have overlooked. Is it wrong to see the arrogance then?”, “Maybe, but not everyone wants to be rescued by a stranger’s opinion”, “Right, but lets say if I then threw a bone into their throat and they began to choke”, “OK?”, “And they began to reach out for help, again, an obvious insinuation that they’d require some assistance.”
She became interested. “What if instead of performing or even attempting to perform the Heimlich maneuver wasn’t in my best interests but rather, I stood there patiently asking for a doctor or a professional to step up and help?”, “I don’t quite get it?”, “Wouldn’t it be more asinine of me to pretend not to want to do something within their favor?”, “Yes, that does make sense in that context but most people would rather prefer knowing an individual were more qualified for the job”, “Yes, and what if there weren’t a more qualified individual available at the time?”, “In that particular circumstance, it would seem appropriate. In most others you’d have to consider their fear in what you would say or even..do, to share your sudden brightness of knowledge to their apparent needs”, “But lets just say, it’s a regular circumstance.. one where they make it obvious to another who has acquired enough experience to help”, “And who determines your experience?” Good question, “I would of course”, “and that’s the problem, you can’t possibly bring yourself to the assumption that what you can do for someone else has qualitative retrospect against a more professional approach.” Sure, it makes sense. You see a problem and compassion asserts you to share a solution similar to your own problems you’ve faced, but many would rather not confide in you for the sheer sake of not knowing you – aha!. “And it’s because they don’t know me right?”, “That would do it”, “Well what makes them so sure they’d know the professional?”, “They’d get to know the professional”, “Why couldn’t they get to know me?”, “Because the circumstances probably wouldn’t offer the opportunity for them to.
I see just where you’re going with this out of the box thinking and I’ve a solution of my own. Shall I?”, “Indeed” I said. “You like to make love to your wife, correct?” I liked where this was going, “Yes, I very much so do”, “Would you like to make love to her now?”
“Yes, lets!” She got up and threw her finest Victoria secret on the bed, “Get the lights will you and set the candle and slow music for us”. I did just that and more, I got damn near naked. “So about this solution of yours..”. “shhh, are you comfortable?” she asked, “Yes” I replied. She climbed into bed with 4 layers of clothing on, “Goodnight”.
“What the fuck? Just what the hell are you doing?”,